
Fading echoes of summer’s play
Across the pastures, streams and fields
Long shadows dance the end of day
Where harvests dry and beg for yield
October pushes cool its breath
Her dark skies forcing sun’s surrender
Giving fruit and trees a promised death
Amid displays of autumn’s splendor
This is a beautiful poem, Jerry. The word “surrender” makes me think of October having her lover, Summer surrender to her beauties. Kevin
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I like it a lot. Nice rhythm, flow. Not in love with the last line. I wish you could show more, without the adjective. You did it it the beginning, colors shadows. I could see it. Splendor doesn’t give me anything to look it. Just sayin’, Others will not agree.
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I think it’s a good poem, nice rhythm, nice flow. I’m not in love with the last line. I would like splendor to be replaced with image. You have done this nicely at the beginning of the poem. Splendor is too easy, doesn’t give me much to see. Others will not agree. Just sayin’.
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A sensitive look at an out of season subject, Jerry. Presented with great perception and just the right choice of word and phrase to bring Autumn to vivid life.
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Thanks Roland. I am so happy you like it.
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