Tag: humor

A Mouse in the House

On By Jerry BrothertonIn Poetry, Rhyming20 Comments

I walked into my closet last week
dressed in naught but socks and underwear
I bent over to pick up my boots
Surprise– a furry creature was there

So I yelped and jumped back a few steps
I’ll say he nearly scared me to death
I flung my right work boot at him
after I had finally caught my breath

Well I missed him by a country mile
and he quickly scampered out the door
That’s when I took aim with my left boot
it thumped and skidded across the floor

I chased it round and round the kitchen
by now I’d armed myself with a broom
I swiped at it Wayne Gretsky style
sent it flying to the dining room

By now the dog had joined in the chase
we were set to show this mouse his tomb
When he ran into my wife’s office
while she was in a meeting on Zoom

Somehow I managed a screeching halt
No view of my boxers or the mouse
But my angry wife has banished me
from playing mouse hockey in the house

As for the mouse I have not a clue
just where he disappeared to that day
I hope he went home and told his kids
it was too crazy for him to stay

~ Hey Boomers ~

On By Jerry BrothertonIn Poetry, RhymingLeave a comment


What will we do now that we’ve reached Gen Z
will we have to do like hurricanes do
give them names like Alpha, Beta and Gamma
or perhaps just Roman Numeral I and II

Shall we call the new babies Gen Trump
or perhaps Gen Pandemic or Gen Covid
or do we just let them live out their lives
like long ago generations did

You see, I don’t recall Gen Caveman
or Gen Industrial Age
and they seemed to have made it just fine
without the help of some superfluous adage

I wonder why we started naming ourselves
are the children so ashamed of their parents
perhaps afraid they won’t be able to overcome
the terms of their inheritance

The Great Back Stabbing…

On By Jerry BrothertonIn Non Fiction, Short Stories20 Comments

Now this is the way I remember the story going. I could be wrong, I was only 5 at the time.

“Mother, might I have a piece of your deliciously fried chicken. You make the best there is in all the world,” I asked.

She looked at me with love in her eyes and said, “I’m sorry my precious son, the favorite of all my children, but you will have to wait until your father gets home. Then we shall all eat together. It would be a shame if your father was deprived of your company. It will be so wonderful to sit at talk with you. You are the best son any parent could ever ask for.”

“ Oh I do understand dear mother, I shall wait patiently like a dutiful son. Gee I sure love you. Is there anything that I might help you with?”

So there I, was sitting patiently and watching her frying her chicken and singing. I was thinking how great it was to have such a fantastic mother.

But suddenly my evil brother Phillip came slinking out from the shadows. He had an evil grin on his face, and a cloak half covering his head. Being the horrible brute that he was, he informed her that he was in a hurry and could do whatever he wanted because he was a big brother. He grabbed a piece of that chicken off the plate and went running out the back door. “Bwaa…Haa…Haa,” he laughed as he ran out.

Now with that turn of events, my mother quickly spun around and with that fork still in her hand, started shaking it in his direction. “Just for that young man, you will have to do without your sup…” That fork, slippery from chicken grease, went sailing out of her hand with the accuracy of a cruise missile and with divine providence stuck smack dab in the middle of his back.

You would have thought that she had stabbed him in the back with a machete the way she ran to him. I mean, she was all over him…hugging and kissing and praying.

“Oh my goodness mother,” I said. “I do hope that my dear precious brother is alright, but if you’ve killed him, may I have his piece of chicken?’