~ Jim…

He’d wake up sorta rough around the edges
then he’d pull in his teeth from out of the glass
yawn then rub his eyes with the back of his hands
scratch his belly for a while and then his ass

After a time you would look around the house
and wonder where in the world old Jim had gone
Out the window you’d see him headed to the
outhouse wearin’ nought but red flannel long johns

He’d have a newspaper tucked under his arm
though everyone knew he couldn’t read a bit
Said he liked to wipe his ass on the headlines
they was already filled to the brim with shit

He’d make it back to the house just in time for
breakfast and barely said a word while we ate
We headed out for chores before the sun rose
cause fifteen minutes early to Jim is late

Now us boys would work until plum soaked with sweat
while Jim just shuffled around a bit you see
Guess we probably couldn’t ask for much more
seeing as how Jim was just past eighty three

Like I said before, Jim never did talk much
when he did it would be best that you take heed
Because he never put in his two cents worth
lest it was something that you was gonna need

He taught me that standing my ground for what’s right
is the way the cowboy life has always been
You should never raise your hand to a woman
and stealing from others is a definite sin

If’n you say that you’ll be doing a job
than you better do it the best that you can
Cause slacking away is the devil’s right hand
you can bet you’ll never be trusted again

Well growing up into manhood on the ranch
I owe almost everything I learned to him
Now as I ride each day out past where he lays
I stop and say a prayer for my friend Jim

~ Dreaming Again…


On dreary winter days when angels weep
I pull a memory from those I keep
and dream of dancing in the summer’s sun

As winter’s cold devours each brown blade
her blanket of snow covers hill and glade
I dream of dancing in the summer’s sun

When leafless limbs get whipped and tossed
I look through my window burdened with frost
and dream of dancing in the summer’s sun

~Jack and Jill…


Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down
And broke his crown
And Jill came tumbling after

We all know
there’s more to go
about this well disaster
Jack got home
started to moan
went to see Doc McMaster

Well ole doc
looked at the clock
said the store’s open uptown
So he wrote
Jack out a note
Told him, “these will fix your crown”

Mom found out
when Jack went out
he was with that slut Jill Brown
Jack got home
mom wasn’t alone
she said son set your ass down

This man here
is preacher Greer
he has some questions for you
If you’ve been
playing again
there’s only one thing to do

Jack and Jill
stayed wed until
their fourteenth child was brand new
Jack was quick
got in his Buick
left Jill living in a shoe

The next time
a hill you climb
just make the right selection
If you go
you need to know
use some kind of protection

~ Learning to Cowboy…

He grew one of them bushy mustaches
like Sam Elliot wears under his nose
Bought him some fancy duds from Cabela’s
sure looked spiffy in his Buckaroo clothes

Alligator skin boots and silver spurs
thought he looked like all them real cowboys did
Added chaps and ten gallon Stetson hat
and called himself the Kansas City Kid

He’d got him a Palomino horse that
he didn’t have a darn clue how to ride
And a beat up old red Ford pickup truck
with a blue eyed dog to be by his side

He packed up and headed to Montana
from his home in the woods of Missouri
Said he was fixin to be a cowboy
and the best anyone would ever see

He rattled that old truck to Montana
it conked out right there in front of the ranch
He said he wanted to learn to cowboy
if the boss seen fit to give him a chance

Well the boss brought him out to the bunkhouse
told all us cowboys that his name was Tim
Said he wants to be a cowboy you see
so show him the ropes and take care of him

I asked him what he knew about branding
could he stick an iron to a cow’s rump
He said he would probably be alright
if I’d be kind enough to show him once

Well can you at least ride that horse of yours
to cut out a heifer or throw your rope
That boy looked at me straight into my eyes
Gave me a slight grin then shook his head “nope”

Think you might be able to break a bronc
that has spent its whole life out running wild
“Well I was in a real mean sheep bustin
back in Missouri when I was a child”

What about fixin up supper vittles
I might be able to use me a cook
“Pretty sure I can do a decent meal
as long as I have some kinda cookbook”

Well I got me these here bulls need cutting
and a short stretch of fence that you could mend
Can’t be that hard to cut a bull he says
if you would just show me how to begin

That was twenty years ago boss hired Tim
cause there was something in him he could see
Tim spent all that time learning to cowboy
and became the best there would ever be

~ For Free…

Only a dime a dozen for these broken dreams
a free wooden nickel with each pack of lies
a jar of hoodwinks, flimflams and befuzzles
a bucket of lost hope and a box of how time flies
a Brooklyn bridge, a few penniless thoughts
next to some wasted time and that mirror and smoke
some dirt-cheap hooks, lines and sinkers
a bunch of fake smiles and a couple pigs in a poke
some bamboozles and a few hornswoggles
a pile of ashes from some bridges I’ve burned
a sows ear, some silver thread and a gold needle
a silk purse filled with the lessons I never could learn